girl guide

I never got to attend Girl Guides. By the time I was old enough my sisters were finished with it and my dad had died. Even if we had been able to afford it I think my mum knew better than to put her high anxiety/overly attached 6 year old in a group that included sleepovers and camping trips. Activities that did not include her were deemed a bad idea for me. I counted myself out of most everything. I missed out on selling the cookies, earning the badges and wearing the sweet little uniform. Somewhere in my head I filed girl guides under “things I will do with my daughter one day because she will not be anxious like me”. When we moved to our new neighbourhood  this summer I was eager for Hannah to make friends and get settled. Girl Guides was the perfect fit. Tonight she attended her first meeting and as she walked away I was overcome with that same feeling I had when I was six, terrified to be walking away from my mum, full of anxiety. I expected her to be the same and waited for her to turn back to me. She did, but only to wave and blow me a kiss. She walked out an hour later, carrying two cartons of cookies, wearing that sweet uniform, talking of future camping trips and sleepovers. “Mummy, can we go? would you like to go camping with me?” Yes. Sign me up. Count me in.

Heidi Benson is a reader based in North Vancouver, BC. Thanks Heidi for sending this in! 
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